In reading studies about self esteem in girls I have mentally  said “Dimmi, dimmi,” to myself many times. According to this study, and others too, the loss of self esteem suffered by white, Hispanic and Asian girls at adolescence, is in general not experienced by black girls. They maintain their good self concept and appear emotionally stronger and more confident. There was something about these findings that seemed tantalizing to me.  I couldn’t explain it, or make sense of why it should be so, but it felt intuitively correct, based on my own experiences with girls in their early teens.

So when in researching International Women’s Day I stumbled across this footage of Maya Angelou, speaking about the women’s movement, instead of dimmi, it was aha. Oh. Yes. I get it.

I’d love to hear your reactions and responses.

When Howard Hanger’s two daughters were approaching middle school age, he knew they were entering a very important developmental phase, one that could have an enormous effect on their self esteem and confidence, so he started Hanger Hall, an all-girls middle school, just for them. 

When I first learned that, I have to admit, I wondered. Isn’t that rather extreme? Is this guy a fanatic of some kind? I mean, starting a whole school for his daughters? But yes, he was that concerned about making sure they had every possible chance to be educated in a place where they could feel comfortable as girls and empowered as young women. He wanted a place where they and other girls could be understood, and where they could shine,  grow, and claim their power as they moved into young womanhood; he wanted a school where the challenges of personal  growth and academic growth would be in balance.

I am happy to report that this is a heartfelt, grounded, and very useful book, by two people who clearly understand and enjoy girls of this age. Parents of tweens and young teenage girls will find this book insightful, reassuring and inspiring. It will be of benefit, as well, to teachers, especially those new to teaching girls of this age and stage.  A Precious Window of Time is optimistic, enthusiastic, and full of vitality. That alone gives it a certain charm; so many books about teens seem to be a maelstrom of distressing problems and crises, real or anticipated, and what to do about them.

The authors do address such fraught topics as drug and alcohol use, sexuality, and moodiness, but they do so in a warm, even-handed and realistic way. I like the sections on social skills, balancing structure and flexibility, friends and community, and the ongoing importance of play. After reading this book, you will not be wringing your hands and lying awake worrying, rather, you’ll feel energized and eager to be a great parent, and/or a great teacher to your girls, in whatever settings you interact with them.

It’s unfortunate that the book is a bit amateurish in ways; it needs the shaping hand of a good editor as well as a professional proofreader. The conversational writing style relies on a lot of dashes — I don’t object to that — but the use of hyphens where em dashes should appear is awkward and confusing. However, these objections are minor compared to the good heart, solid experience, and usefulness of this book.

A Precious Window of Time is available through Lobster Books. I recommend it  to parents  and teachers of middle school age girls. Homeschooling parents in particular might find this book a game-changer and a boon. I would be very interested to hear reactions from readers. I invite you to post here, in comments section of AllGirls.

Dr. Bernice Johnson Reagon

Write a post related to Black History Month? The challenge for me is how to keep it short (and speaking of short, how did the short, cold month of February get chosen for this honor?) So I will not take on the semi-fashionable question of whether we live in “post racial” America (don’t get me started!) and I’m not going to take on the broad sweep of 400 years of unreported, undocumented, disrespected black history. For you young folks, yes, I even remember the olden days, back when we only had white presidents! And a whole lot more.

Earlier this month, Michelle Obama invited a group of schoolkids to the White House for an hour-long workshop, titled “Music that Inspired the Civil Rights Movement.” Social activist and songtalker Dr. Bernice Johnson Reagon, (you may know her as founder of the a cappella ensemble Sweet Honey in the Rock) a Freedom Singer, talked about her childhood and learning to understand the meaning behind the protest song This Little Light of Mine (I’m Gonna Let it Shine).  The message is for everyone, and especially important for girls and women.

All cultures, all religious groups have talked about the phenomenon of light in the context of religious or mystical experience. Buddhists say that all sentient beings are imbued with a spark of inner divine light. Jewish mystics speak of the inner spark or the spark of God. The Koran, referring to humankind, talks about the little candle flames burning in a niche in the wall of God’s temple. In this clip I found on NPR’s website, Dr. Reagon says it so purely, “Think LIFE.”

This Little Light of Mine is easy, even for preschoolers to sing, but it is no baby song. It is strong, seasoned, and penetrates to the bone. When I was a kid, the school day started with the Pledge of Allegiance and a patriotic song. How much better it would be — exponentially better — to skip them both and instead sing “This Little Light of Mine.” Together. Let it shine.

Even though in 1992 Barbie said,”Math class is tough,” much to the legitimate horror of the American Association of University Women, after 18 years Barbie has finally mastered those equations and earned her degree in computer engineering; now she’s ready to take on the world.

She did take a few detours on the way, becoming both president of the United States and a Starfleet officer in 2000. In her younger days she tried ballerina and McDonalds cashier. But now she has found her true calling, we hope.

We are told that the Society of Women Engineers and the National Academy of Engineering were consulted in the kitting out of this latest Barbie doll. I believe that, but I suspect that Mattel tweaked the recommendations a bit. Like: a laptop with Linux has turned bright pink and glittery — and it’s hard to imagine a rookie computer engineer taking it to work. But, I have to say, on a quick look there actually are quite a few pink laptops IRL to choose from!  Barbie also sports pink (of course) eyeglasses, a smartphone with bluetooth headset and a seriously hunk-a-chunk wristwatch. Probably the geek’s delight: an enigmatic Tokyoflash, custom made in hot pink for her. Again, just guessing.

I imagine that the women engineers suggested a casual  pants outfit, more practical and realistic than a dress for computer engineer Barbie, never suspecting that pants would turn into skintight black leggings with silver sparkles. But hey, as long as she can do the work — right?

In order to increase the verisimilitude, perhaps a little accessory kit could be added: Dilbert cartoon book,  half empty bag of Cheetos, a tiny can of Mountain Dew, and some special makeup for drawing the dark circles under her eyes.

Okay! Enough with poking fun. I would now like to say something in support of Barbie. Ahem. She can be something of a ditz, has certainly had some issues with making up her mind about a career (she has had over 100 of them) but keep this in mind: over the long haul, Barbie has been pretty consistent about being gainfully employed. That’s a lot more than you can say for those Disney princesses.

BTW: the binary code on Barbie’s laptop screen reads: Barbie. Over and over. In ASCII. I could tell you were dying to know.

Billie Holiday

You can be up to your boobies in white satin, with gardenias in your hair and no sugar cane for miles, but you can still be working on a plantation.
—Billie Holiday

Never limit yourself because of others’ imagination; never limit others because of your own limited imagination.
— Mae Jemison, astronaut

I know God will not give me anything I cannot handle. I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.
— Mother Theresa

The happiest excitement in life is to be convinced one is fighting for all one is worth on behalf of some clearly seen and deeply felt good.
— Ruth Benedict

My grandfather told me there were two kinds of people: those who do the work, and those who take the credit. You should try to be in the first group because there is less competition.
— Indira Gandhi

If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.
—Sue Grafton

I do not weep at the world—I am too busy sharpening my oyster knife.
—Zora Neale Hurston

Success didn’t spoil me; I’ve always been insufferable.
—Fran Liebowitz

I am prepared to sacrifice every so-called privilege I possess in order to have a few rights.
— Inez Mulholland, suffragist

I was born to swing. That’s all.
— Lil Hardin Armstrong, bandleader, 1930s

A study recently published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that female elementary school teachers who suffered from math anxiety could instill negative gender-biased stereotypes in the girls they teach.  Really? Now that’s not good! From my own personal experience (not statistically significant, I know) as a young girl it never occurred to me that boys could be better in math than girls, never mind that they actually were.  Maybe my teachers suffered no math unease, or maybe I simply just loved math no matter what, or maybe my parents both valued math as much as they valued reading and made that quite obvious at home.  As a young student, the only thing I objected to was a boring teacher or one who was unfair.  I don’t remember any who demonstrated angst of any sort; perhaps they hid it well.  But, let’s assume for a minute that the research is conclusive and that there really are girls out there identifying with their overly math-anxious female teachers to the detriment of their mathematical future.

To use math terminology, success and confidence are directly proportional.  One of the most loved and competent teachers I have ever known taught first grade for over thirty years.  When asked to identify the most profound indicator of student success she replied, “It is amazing to see what kids can do when they think they can, compared to what they can do when they think they can’t.” How true this is for all of us.  I received phone calls from two of my sons last week; both had just started up new courses, one an undergraduate -level mathematics course and the other a graduate-level course about security in the Middle East.  Both guys remarked that their professors were fabulous, and went on to explain that what made these men so extraordinary was their robust, self-assured delivery, which made them absolutely convincing.  Confidence matters!

So what about math education for girls?  Girls need confident, competent women around them every day from the time they first set foot in a school building.  We have come a long way in our understanding of math anxiety, girls and math, and gender differences in learning, but we must still have a way to go if this research is accurate.  I send a big thank you to every elementary school teacher for helping our girls build the foundation they need to succeed in this modern, technical world.

And, for those teachers who are anxious when arithmetic time rolls around, I encourage you to do something about it.  Like your own students, you must be confident about what you do to be the best you can be for the kids.  If this means diving into another math class at the local university, do it.  If it means signing up for a summer math program for educators, do it.  You owe it to yourself and to the girls you teach.

For the parents out there, look for signs that your girls are losing confidence in their math ability and address it.  If you, yourself, disliked math in school or thought you were terrible at it, consider keeping that to yourself (let’s face it, you don’t tell them everything you think or did).  Don’t give girls license to dislike math, don’t let them think it is only for boys, and don’t let them fall behind.  The National Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM http://www.stemedcoalition.org/) initiative is funding programs in our schools across the country to promote these fields; the premise being that we cannot compete as a nation unless we produce top-thinkers in these disciplines.  Now, more than ever, we need the female perspective in design and research.

Girls deserve a solid mathematical foundation.  As a math teacher at an all girls’ school in Massachusetts, I see first-hand that a single-sex environment could be the answer for many of our students.  Here the best math student is a girl, the most outspoken math student is a girl, and all of the kids in the BC Calculus class are girls.  But, for a typical young woman in high school, the boy sitting next to her in math class can influence her in ways I won’t even begin to address.  The bottom line:  If she has a strong foundation and believes in herself, she’ll have what it takes to succeed in mathematics and the future will be a better one for all of us.  Let’s do what we can to make sure this happens.

—Sally Reid

However, in its wisdom, the Chase Community Giving Advisory board made some additional grants to charities that seemed to them particularly worthy and had received a large proportion of votes. We are happy to report that The St. Bernard Project received $37,000, and hope that NCGS involvement helped the Advisory board reach their decision. Camfed International (Campaign for Female Education) received the same amount, towards educating girls in Zimbabwe. Their cause is certainly one that NCGS can support wholeheartedly.

Chase Community Giving found their first Facebook giveaway to be an overwhelming success, and they have plans to repeat it, so “fan” them on Facebook, and use your votes to do some good in the world.

We want to respond; it’s basic to our humanity — to help, to heal, to feed, to comfort. To do what we can, whether by bringing water to the thirsty, cleaning wounds, giving blood or writing checks. Disasters large and small can bring out the best in us —  we rise to individual acts of heroism and collective acts of charity when we heed that call to service.

This Martin Luther King Day I have three things on my mind: the genius of the great Dr. King, the disaster in Haiti, and the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. I’m wishing right now we had a Martin Luther King, Jr. for this millennium — someone whose words and courage could inspire, persuade and uplift. We‘ll always need that.

The disaster  in Haiti is a nightmare of violent death, entrapment, and grievous injury, all exacerbated by an infrastructure that is missing, crushed, or carried away. And because of that, medical care on the island has been jerked rudely backward to the time of the Civil War and before. People are dying of sepsis and dehydration; bloated corpses are putrefying in the heat. Can this really be 2010? Paul Farmer’s organization, Partners in Health will be the lifeline here, with their deep connections in Haiti and excellent command of the best ways to deliver lifesaving medical aid in resource-poor settings.

In the footage and photos from Port-au-Prince, we see and hear the echoes of the aftermath of hurricane Katrina. There are many parallels, the heartbreaking images of suffering people being only one of them. Lest we forget: Katrina’s fifth anniversary is this coming summer. Let’ s not be guilty of a short attention span. The “crisis du jour” mentality of charitable giving is powerfully reinforced by on-again/off-again TV coverage, and we need to remember that even as Haiti is in ruins and desperately needs our help, distress did not disappear in New Orleans when the news photographers went home. There’s pluck and hard work afoot in NOLA, but help of many kinds is still needed quite urgently.

The girls’ schools represented by NCGS have made a commitment to the St. Bernard Project. We’ll work together  to raise money to build a house for a displaced family, and we’ll do it in time for our annual conference in June, this year in New Orleans at Louise McGehee School.  As part of our plan, we want to get every single person who reads this blog to vote for St. Bernard in the Chase Community Giving challenge on Facebook, and to spread the word. Wouldn’t it inspire a great feeling of hope to see the St. Bernard project be awarded a million dollars? It would please the likes of Dr. King. So as we celebrate his birthday, let’s keep his dream alive. We have the power to help make it happen. If you are on Facebook you can vote for five charities. Please use your power to vote for the St. Bernard Project.

Consider how recently it was that New Orleans was getting the hand-wringing news coverage, and think about the courageous and hardworking people who are still in the trenches in the absence of much recognition or praise. Think of them as you read this stanza of Marge Piercy’s poem To Be of Use—

I want to be with people who submerge
in the task, who go into the fields to harvest
and work in a row and pass the bags along,
who stand in the line and haul in their places,
who are not parlor generals and field deserters
but move in a common rhythm
when the food must come in or the fire be put out.

And certainly the great Dr. King would agree. In his own words — “Their destiny is tied up with our destiny, and their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom; we cannot walk alone.” Please, we only have through Friday, January 22nd to vote for St. Bernard on Facebook. Do it now while it’s on your mind.

(read the whole poem here)

Resolutions don’t seem to work for me. I always take on too much and then disappoint myself. And it’s a drag to be calling yourself down over failed self-improvement when it’s only February. I try now to think more in trends. What worked last year? How can I do more of that, and less of what didn’t.

Here’s what worked for me in 2009: Say yes whenever possible. The idea is certainly not proprietary with me. One of the many places you’ll see it put forward is in literature about improvisation. Patricia Ryan Madson’s book Improv Wisdom, explains the aptness of yes in a very entertaining way. Here’s a brief excerpt:

Saying yes (and following through with support) prevents you from committing a cardinal sin “blocking.” Blocking comes in many forms; it is a way of trying to control the situation instead of accepting it. We block when we say no, when we have a better idea, when we change the subject, when we correct the speaker, when we fail to listen, or when we simply ignore the situation. The critic in us wakes up and runs the show. Saying no is the most common way we attempt to control the future. For many of us the habit is so ingrained that we don’t notice we are doing it. We are not only experienced at blocking others, we commonly block ourselves . . . A sophisticated critic may even appear to be agreeing by offering the “yes but” response. Try substituting “yes and” for “yes but” — this will get the ball rolling.

So what about kids who are asking for impossible things? The nine year old who desperately wants a pony even though you live in a two bedroom condo in the city? Just say Yes? How about just agreeing with the desire: “Yes, wouldn’t that be great, to have your own pony? I wish I could give it to you, and a silver saddle, too. Imagine my Annabelle, galloping across an open field!  I wonder if we could think of some ways to get a pony into your life?” (Saving money for riding camp, for example) See how different this feels from, “No we can’t afford a pony, and anyhow it’s ridiculous, there’s no place to keep it.” Whatever the currently unfulfillable wish, I think it’s nice to add: “Someday I hope your dream comes true.”

And while we are dealing with kids, “Yes, later,” is a happy re-do of “No, not now.”

So this year, when I can’t decide, my default will be yes. Go see a movie I’m not sure I’ll like? Yes. Do I have time to help stretch a huge canvas this weekend? Yes, we’ll figure it out. Show up at your concert or opening? Yes, I can.

It’s good, too, to be able to see the important yes inside some of your nos.  Someone once told me that when you say no to a request, understand that it can be a way of saying yes to something else. So it’s — No, sorry, I can’t help with the fundraiser for the animal shelter (because I am saying Yes to a young person who needs me right now.) Or —No, can’t hang that exhibition (because I am saying Yes to my own painting.) This helps me feel good and strong about my nos, rather than guilty or ungenerous.

So I am starting the new decade by saying YES to all its possibilities and adventures which are yet to be revealed. If you need a little extra inspiration today, I hope you’ll take the time to watch this TED talk by the irrepressible Benjamin Zander. Don’t ask me what it’s about. Just say Yes.

yes is a pleasant country:
if’s wintry
(my lovely)
let’s open the year

—e.e. cummings

The Amgen Award for Science Teaching Excellence is an annual awards program that recognizes extraordinary contributions by educators who are elevatinf the level of science literacy through through creativity in the classroom An independent panel of judges selects the winners based on the following criteria: creativity and effectiveness of teaching methods; the plan for the use of grant money to improve science education resources in their schools; and an innovative science lesson plan showcasing innovative methods in the classroom. Thirty-four teachers will be honored. Read all about it.

The Toshiba/National Science Teachers Association ExploraVision Awards Program, the world’s largest K–12 science and technology competition, is now accepting entries for its 2010 program year. The ExploraVision program, sponsored by Toshiba and administered by the National Science Teachers Association (NSTA), challenges teams of 2-4 students to research scientific principles and current technologies as the basis for designing innovative technologies that could exist in 20 years. Students on the four first-place ExploraVision winning teams will each receive a $10,000 U.S. Series EE Savings Bond valued at maturity.  Students on second-place teams will each receive a $5,000 bond valued at maturity. Student-team coaches/teachers will receive an expense paid trip to Washington, DC in June for ExploraVision Awards Weekend for the coach and mentor of each national winning team; a one-year NSTA membership to coaches of the national winning teams; a Toshiba-branded product for the coach and mentor of each regional winning team; a certificate of participation and an entry gift for each coach and mentor of every team that submits a complete entry; and a special discount on Toshiba computer products.
Schools will receive a Toshiba laptop for each of the schools of the regional winning teams and an awards ceremony for each regional winning team at their school where they will receive a winner’s banner, plaque, and other gifts. Details and how to apply are here.