Sabrina Parsons
Last month I wrote a post on my blog, all about research that showed girls who graduated from all girls’ schools had an edge over their counterparts who went to co-ed high schools. My post was well received, and got some good comments. It also is what linked me up with Sally, and the National Coalition Of Girls’ Schools and is the reason I get the honor and privilege of guest posting on this blog. What I find interesting in comments made on my blog, and a few comments already posted on this blog, are the mothers with young daughters who have commented, wondering whether sending their daughters to all girls’ schools is something they should consider — even if they themselves did not attend an all girls’ school.
I thought I would try and address these comments and shed some light. One of the mothers who commented on Sally’s post on this blog said:
Sally, this is so cool! I enjoyed the first two posts…maybe you will inspire me to send one of my girls to an all-girls school! (something I’m theoretically interested in, not sure I can convince them to consider it…we are doing all-girls camp in the summer, which is fabulous). It was actually the experience of having my daughter (then age 11) at an all-girls camp for a month that made me start thinking more about the idea of an all-girls school. There is something incredibly powerful for girls in seeing all the roles in a community filled by girls and women…
A commenter on my blog said this:
Thanks for an informative post! I grew up in co-ed schools, so it’s interesting to know what life was like in a single-sex school. And even though my daughter is just a baby now, your post gave me something to consider as I think about her educational future. I’d love for her to grow up in the kind of intellectually stimulating and supportive environment that you describe.
I love that these mothers are thinking about educating their daughters not just as growing people, but growing women. I strongly believe that even today in 2009, we still face a fairly distinct gender divide. Nationally girls still do worse in science and math than their male counterparts, and unfortunately there are still fewer women going into scientific fields, than men. There are people in very prominent positions still espousing the ridiculous myths that women don’t do well in math and science because they lack an innate ability. In 2005, Larry Summers, then the President of Harvard University, stated that women simply lack aptitude in these area, and don’t have the same innate ability as men. He also thought it would be worth mentioning “that women remain underrepresented in the upper echelons of academic and professional life—in part, he said, because many women with young children are unwilling or unable to put in the 80-hour work-weeks needed to succeed in those fields.“ If your jaw hasn’t dropped it should have. This is a man that is supposed to be leading one of the finest academic institutions in the world, and here he is in 2005, telling women and girls that they lack innate ability.
Why do I bring this up? Because although I was shocked, angered, and upset by Summers’ comments, these types of attitudes are still pervasive in our society. This is the reality of the world we live in. On a regular basis I will deal with men in business, that still question why I am CEO, and how a girl could possibly lead a technology company. A few years ago I was featured in an article in USA Today, entitled “Mommy Wars” that focused on the different choices made by mothers, and why some chose to work and some chose to stay at home. The article ran both online, and in the actual paper copy. This is one of the comments that was made about me, in the online edition:
How can you be a CEO and a Mom at the same time? My experience with mothers, especially new ones, is that they never stop talking about their kids. So one can conclude that a “Mommy CEO” sits around at work and talks about kids all day. Also women are inherently emotional and good businesses are not run on emotions, bad ones are. Personally I’m not going to listen to a CEO or respect one that is nursing a child. Women belong in the home, not playing CEO. Its not play time this is the real world, stop making business decisions and start making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for your kids. Come on.
I certainly do not include these comments or reference people I don’t respect, like Larry Summers, just to be sensational. But I do want to get your attention. I do want to put the reality right in your face : as much as we want to believe that “We’ve come a long way, baby”, we still have so much further to go. And I don’t want to give the impression that I run around griping about the inequities women face. I don’t. I am very happy with my life, very confident in my career, and truly believe that there is nothing I can’t do, if I want to, and I put hard work and effort behind it. And when I run into not so smart people, who believe that women belong only in the home, or aren’t naturally good at math or science, I just point them to all the women I know, who are Doctors and PhD candidates, and engineers, and software developers, and CEOs and Presidents, and entrepreneurs, and the list goes on and on. And I can tell you today with certainty, that my confidence was born at Castilleja School, an all girls’ college prep school. So all you mothers and fathers out there raising smart, inquisitive, knowledge-thirsty girls, think about the benefits an all girls school can have. Yes, it may be expensive. Yes, it may be hard to convince your 13 year old to go to the all girls’ school. But it is a gift you will give your daughters, that will carry them with confidence, for the rest of their lives.
-Sabrina Parsons, CEO of Palo Alto Software, and MommyCEO
Tags: all girls' school, castilleja, confidence, educating daughters, mommy wars, national coalition of girls' schools, palo alto software, sabrina parsons
Hello undecided: I’m a 60 year old grandmother, with a 7month old granddaughter. I hope she has the option to go to an all girl’s school – I did for 3 years of High School, Santa Catalina in Monterey California which propelled me to 4 years of Smith College in Northampton Ma. As an artist and MBA degree IT professional I compete with, work with, and collaborate with both men and women in both arenas. Good to get one track set up and then join another. My education was a blessing and cut down on the static of hormones and distractions. As an adult who welds, cuts steel, writes specifications and code, and delivers systems for the Federal Reserve Bank and US Treasury it probably all started when a few adults convinced me to keep going and to excel. This certainly occurs in both co-ed and all girl schools but the all girl option is a rich and rewarding one which is distinct and short lived and lasts. I still send money to both schools and go to reunions if that is a test of loyalty.
Good luck to all making the big choices!
Mlordmetalart.com.
Summers’ utterance about women’s abilities was just dumb. You notice Harvard replaced him with a woman president. On the biological level, recent genome research shows barely an eye-blink difference between the capabilities of men and women. On the societal level, any society will produce the kind of people it needs in order to survive. And our culture no longer needs the little woman to keep the home fires burning. Since they can do the same job as men, let’s get them out there to do it.
My first two years of high school, in the early ’50s, were spent at an all-boys’ school. I hated it. I finally got myself ejected at the end of my second year and ascended into Nirvana at a suburban public school. I did not take a book out of that building my entire junior and senior year. Why? Girls. They were everywhere. Forget about concentrating in study hall, I couldn’t even concentrate on a baseball.
In the late ’70s I took single care of my two sons while their mother, Jane, who had attended a single-sex secondary school, lived in New York City and did great things. She had a comfortableness about herself and who she was. Would she have been the same way if she had not attended a single-sex school? Who knows? She could tell a raunchy joke with the best of them, and I know she didn’t learn that in high school.
I now have a granddaughter who is nine, and who has a mouth on her like a sailor. A very intelligent sailor. There is much discussion already in the family about where to send her to secondary school. The topic of single-sex versus co-ed comes up a lot. It’s too soon to tell, but it sure is nice having an option.
There are many professional schools for girls that provide different types of professional courses in various fields. The aim of the girls schools is to offer comprehensive and basic education in which it work for further need and implement, the school believe to offer authentic and relevant educational programs.